Birth over lunch

Birth 3

As you read this blog, you will notice that I’m not afraid to speak to a pregnant woman about her birth preferences. So one day after church we had a couple over for lunch, they attended the Reichard’s, (the wonderful couple I’ve been living with for the past 3 months) church and guess what? They were pregnant and due within a few weeks.

After chatting, we realized we had much in common, she was a social worker like me and she was planning on a hospital birth and didn't mind me attending. She was concerned that she was too far from me but the hospital was only one hour away and the experience was worth the time and gas money. By this time, I already had a mother that was due 2 weeks before this birthing mothers due date and we decided that she would let me know when she is in labor and if I am free I could come.

This mother's due date was the weekend that I was planning to go away for a Christian retreat. I was praying that the baby will come early. The birthing mother also wanted her baby to come earlier too. However, I have learned very quickly that babies are born on their own time. Since that was my desire, I whispered a prayer "God if it is your will, I would like to go to the retreat that weekend and I would like to attend the birth, please allow me to do both". When I got the text "Hey my water just broke and I'm on the way to the hospital", I was so excited mommy was in labor and it was a week before the retreat.

I learned a few lessons during this birth; know the hospital, know your parents, and use your words wisely.

Know the hospital: I couldn't find the way to get into the maternity ward due to the entrance closing at a certain time. It took me about 20 mins to get to the birthing room. In this case, she was far from giving birth but I learned that it would be good to know about entrances and labor support policy and procedure for the hospital.

Know your parents: Because I became their doula last minute and baby came early, I didn't have much time to get to know their preference. While at the hospital, we were able to go over somethings which were beneficial, however, I recognized the importance of preparation. Parents feel comfortable making informed decisions during the intensity of labor which only comes with prior knowledge of the options provided.

Use your words wisely: I realize that I do not favor the use of the word "Relax" during labor, not that there is anything wrong with the word. But to tell a woman who has been in labor for 15 hours to relax during very intense contractions just wasn't the best word choice. You are most likely going to get a "Don't tell me to relax, you do not know how much this hurts" response.

This was my first doula experience by myself and I am so grateful that this couple allowed me to join them in those precious moments. God's timeline amazes me, and I desire to be in His will at all times. The fact that this birthing mother was due the weekend of the retreat and I already had another birthing mother due that could have conflicted with her birth. God saw fit that this birthing mother came earlier so I can go to both births and the retreat. Thus it is true, "to everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven: a time to be born... He (God) hath made everything beautiful in His time". {Ecc 3:1-2,11}

Blessings!